Sometimes things happen.. that makes you look at them under different light, things that you’ve always taken for granted or let’s say never happened to you.
It was a bright day, she was leaning by the window which had a view of hills top with a nice lake in front of it. It was a mirage, an imagination, a myth that could never come true – not because I presume in happy beginnings, but because of my apprehensions of it. In a New York minute I dropped my luggage and then there was this problem with my eyes, they were locked, I was not able to take them off. As if everything stopped, that shout of the conductor, passengers howling, vehicles honking etc.. were all like extinguishing a forest fire with an eyedropper. I have heard people saying:
“If you love something, you know what the best in the world actually looks like.”
And then there was I, looking at her, no no.. actually gazing at her. A genuine affection for a simple, sober, ordinary girl. Bellissimo, the pact of intimacy was written on her face, she held me captured with her embrace. You must have heard about the sky full of stars or a green oasis, oh boy.. she made me witness it in the city bus. I decided no matter what.. I’m gonna give you my heart. I knew that I was head over heels for her.
Then before anything I could do or say the laws of physics played their role.. you just can’t keep science out of anything these days. The law of inertia came into play ‘an unbalanced force’ pushed me and pushed me hard.. and eventually I fell but this time gravity was not held responsible for the fall, well in terms of physics, chemistry and mathematics it was an important phenomenon that happened. But was it a haste, crush or just a short lived emotion that just exploded within me? Absolutely not!!
How I came to that conclusion? Because that short lived emotion ‘infatuation’ as the unethical, uneducated people name it. was transformed from a feeble spark to a flickering flame and then into a mighty blaze*. Every time I thought about her, I got lured into something.. I couldn’t dodge.
Yes, I admit I had my first love!!
It was like a kitchen light at midnight, day and night it was the same thing. I reckoned something within me that made me feel ecstatic, something deeper than I’ve ever known. So, when we talk about infinity there’s no measure for that same is with love also, you can’t measure it, every second it expands, just like the universe. For me she became the universal law, which gave soul to the world, flock to imagination, and glamour to everything around me.
But there were unspoken conversations, unuttered words, and I guess when you meet someone ‘the right person’ it clicks to both of you and things are made to work and definitely the nature helps you in that. So we met, we talked, I used that time to learn everything I could about her and tell about myself… It was rate determining step the slowest of a chemical reaction yet exciting because every time I put my phone down I wanted to know more. We were talking like every day disclosing more and more of ourselves to each other.
I was playing cool, I didn’t rush, I let it grew. And it did.. that led us to have deeper talks about our past, about our future of being together, about love, happiness, what life is ? what it would be if we were together ? There was this time where I didn’t had words maybe because I wanted them to be perfect, or maybe I was nervous that nothing came out of my mouth. The day I saw her, after that every second has been a wonderful chapter in history.
I have had a reason now to celebrate for all four seasons. The more I discover the more I fall in love with her.
Free.. as a bird, as a spirit, as a soul,
The feeling so sturdy, I can’t control
At times serene at times searching, as love I explore,
I adore her today, I adore her tomorrow,
Don’t rush let it grow,
The hearts mysteries elude all,
Love made me fall where gravity was not at all
It’s coming to spring, yet to fly.. my quirky love life.
Gaurav Dey 